My World
It seemed like such a great idea at the time, a
once-in-a-lifetime experience. Really hard to pass up. So I took the plunge.
Before telling you about that, it may help to know a bit on how I discovered the
opportunity. Like most opportunities there is only a moment to act. Indecision
usually causes that moment to evaporate and never to return. That's how it was,
a moment like no other. Now, I'm not usually one to get drawn in by baubles of
shining light and other 'pretty' things, but this really lovely glowing bubble
intrigued me. Sure the others were visually appealing and also glowed and
shimmered, but this one really stood out. And being the inquisitive type, I
wanted to know why. That's when the opportunity presented itself. Very subtle,
so subtle, I might have missed it altogether if I hadn't heard that voice
inviting me to look closer. Hearing voices wasn't so odd but hearing myself
called by a name I never imagined, was truly awe'd.
So, now totally, intrigued, I felt compelled to
investigate this very unique and fascinating bit of lightly stuff. Was this an
opportunity or was it just a play of words :-)
So, now back to the story, I spent a lot of time and
energy trying to get into the idea and each attempt left me frustrated. Clearly,
there was something wrong, and I am not known for my mistakes. Finally, I just
sorta gave up trying and found myself inside a lovely room. A wonderfully
beautiful room. But look as I might, there was neither a door nor a window. But
it was a most comfortable room. And although I seemed to be the only being
here, I could very distinctly hear music and occasionally, the sounds of some
body talking.
I also discovered after a bit that I was unable to leave.
At first it bothered me just slightly, but after a while I became angry and
frustrated. I tried to make an opening in the box but the only tools I had were
my own self and I wasn't very sharp and only seemed to enhance the beauty of the
room with my efforts rather than actually make any progress in creating an
opening.
I was able to scrape some material off the walls however
and with a bit of massaging was able to mold the bits and pieces into a form.
The stuff was like clay and after a while I had fashioned several forms and at
least had some company now. I even made a door and window out of the stuff. And
found my self a bit sharper and was able to scrape stuff off the walls much
easier. Interestingly, some of the stuff was hard and shiny. Perhaps, I was
getting into the real content of the room finally.
The door and window made my room seem much less like a
prison and more like a hotel. The door didn't really open to the outside but the
window appeared to actually have a changing view. I'd move the forms around
often and my little room seemed so much more spacious now. And I continued to
work on the scraping and was determined to exit this place. The music and voices
continued and seemed to come from the forms I had fashioned. I was no longer
angry, not even frustrated, but certainly felt trapped.
One day I noticed that the forms had been moved and I was
quite surprised. I certainly didn't remember moving them! Maybe I was going
in-sane. It was hard to tell how long I had been there, and perhaps it was a
sort of trick of my mind. I found myself even talking to the forms now and then
and was very astounded when I clearly heard one of them talking back to me.
Resigned and surrendered to my p-light, I was thankful for the conversation. I
continued to scrape at the walls though, and fervently so.
The piles of stuff that fell onto the floor seemed to
disappear. I had stopped making forms long ago. One day I was contemplating and
could swear, I saw some of the forms I had made, digging into the piles of stuff
and making forms of their own fashion. Funny I hadn't noticed that before. I
watched intently and one of the the original forms spoke to me. I had named them
all, long ago, but this one had changed their name. S/He addressed me as
'Father' and asked why I had made them. Was there some great purpose or wondrous
meaning involved in their formation. I wasn't sure how to answer. I was
perplexed and a bit awe'd by the question. After all they were just the bits of
stuff I had scraped off the walls and ....
I suppose this bit of my life/existence and it's re-call
have gone on for long enough now. I could write pages and pages of stories and
re-collections of the room, my prison cell and all the forms contained within.
Yes, I did finally make a 'whole' and was able to leave and hence, this story
you can now read. The denizens and forms that I had made and even the ones they
fashioned, also came through the 'whole' with me. Looking back, I realized that my
cell was just one of many that make up the entity that is known as 'god' in the
language of the forms. And my scraping and was the process by which the cell
walls were opened to allow the transfer of communication with the wonder.
The hardened and quickened cell walls had grown so
encompassed and filled with self, that the rest of the 'body' was unable to
penetrate and bring back the one cell that held the thought of being. And the
wonder of light again flowed throughout.